Matt's Seville Survival Guide
by CamoHunter
Summary: Hello, and my name is Mathew Morgan. This Survival Guide is written for your own safety. CGI version. Written not too long after Chipwrecked. Rated T, but may contain M rated material. Must read! ENJOY!
1. A root beer worthy welcome

**(A;N) Okay, so I was gonna hold this until The Boy, the Girl, and the Biker, but I just couldn't wait! I idea for this was inspired by How to Live With the Sevilles, written by KiBoy, and What Happens When?, written by The Simonette254. Both of these are great stories written by great authors and I highly recommend them. Anyway on with the show. Wait, there is one thing I have to do first:**

**Disclaimer: AATC belongs to Ross Bagdasarian, Ki and Lucas belong to KiBoy, Julia belongs to Soccer. Freak. 67, Alixe and Larry belong to H. , and Luke belongs to EpicGameLord.**

**Chapter 1: A root beer worthy welcome**

**Rule No.1: If you break into Matt's root beer cellar, and he doesn't get mad, then you must be someone really special…**

Matt: Be advised that there is a reason why I made this the number one rule.

Everyone: Why?

Matt: Because even Ki knows this from experience…

Ki: *rubs neck from the memory* I never saw a chipmunk defend something with that much dedication…

Everyone: *O-O*

**Rule No.2: If you have a problem with somebody, call the Task Force Seville…**

Ki&Lucas&David: *polishing and sharpening their respective swords*

Theodore: *walks in crying*

Eleanor: THEO! What happened?

Theodore: Ryan. Again…

Eleanor: *eyes fill with anger* THAT'S IT! Ki, Lucas, David…

Task Force Seville: *salutes* We're on it! *marches out of the house*

_30 minutes later…_

Ryan: *dangling from a butcher's hook, sliced open, several burn marks, broken bones, and his heart completely removed*

David: I think our work here is done…

**Rule No.3: Never bet with the following: Lucas, Alvin, Alex, David, and Matt… mostly Matt.**

Lucas&David&Matt: *playing a poker game*

Julia: *walks in* Ooooh, a battle of the gamblers. So who's winning?

Guys: *point at Matt*

Julia: *raises an eyebrow* Hm?

Lucas: *groans* He's been taking our money for the past hour and a half.

David: Alex and Alvin had to quit because they ran out of money!

Julia: *O-O*

**Rule No.4: If you here 'weird noises', DO NOT DISTURB!**

Matt: *shudders*

Alvin: What's wrong with you?

Matt: This rule brings back bad memories…

Makayla&David: *blush*

Alvin: *O-O*

**Rule No.5: Don't call David 'Davey Boy' … unless you are Makayla.**

Alex: Even I'm not allowed to call him that…

**Rule No.6: Don't call Matt 'Mattie' … this one includes everybody.**

Matt: What can I say? I hate being called Mattie.

David: Hmm… hey MATTIE!

Matt: DIE IN PAIN DAVID!

**Rule No.7: The gamers of the house are not to be interrupted when in their respective trances…**

Matt&Alvin&Luke&Lucas&Toby: *staring at their screens, unblinking*

Alixe: They get really grouchy when they're interrupted.

Brittany: I still have some bruises from Alvin and Luke.

**Rule No.8: If you call Matt, David, and Alex by their callsigns, they will feel like soldiers again…**

Ki: *sighs* That was a great day when I did that. They were pretty much under my command for an entire week…

**Rule No.9: It's not a wise thing to call Makayla 'Missy' …**

David&Brittany: Even we aren't allowed to call her that…

Simon: We were too late for Dave…

Jeanette: He will be missed…

**Rule No.10: Don't say that Theodore and Eleanor's cooking is bad.**

Larry: Because it's not!

Lucas: They're the best cooks in the house!

Ki: Although, that time when Dave left me, Matt, and David here alone, Matt was the cook, and he made these kick-ass steaks.

Matt: Thank you Ki…

David: What do you put in them?

Matt: It's a Morgan family recipe so I'm not telling.

**Rule No.11: Matt has snake genes…**

Luke: Hey Matt, did you know that your ancestors were snakes?

Matt: *spits out his drink* WHAT?!

Luke: Hey, it's the truth…

**Rule No.12: Limp Bizkit is banned… I mean it's not banned. It's awesome. Really, really awesome…**

David: *sheathes his Cavalry Sabre* That's what I thought…

**Rule No.13: It's a bad idea to try to fight David.**

Alvin: My paw was broken for God knows how long…

Matt: Enough said…

**Rule No.14: Don't touch Ki or Lucas' katanas or David's cavalry sabre.**

Toby: Why not touch David's sabre? I can Ki and Lucas' point, but David?

David: Want to see what happened to the last person who touched it?

Toby: What?

David: *throws a bloody human hand at Toby*

Toby AHH! POINT TAKEN!

**Rule No.15: No fights. This goes for Matt and Alvin.**

Matt: He came at me first. Self defense, man!

Dave: Okay, I'll take your plea this time…

**Rule No.16: There are a lot of things you don't know about Brittany that involves Matt…**

Eleanor: Like what?

Brittany: *looks at Matt* Certain 'magazines'…

Eleanor: *O-O*

**Rule No.17: Matt's threats can be a little graphic…**

Matt: AALLVVIINN!

Alvin: *runs in with a bottle of root beer*

Matt: *tackles Alvin to the floor and takes the root beer bottle* Alvin, this is your ONLY warning, if you EVER do that again, I swear to God, I will rip off your balls, and I WILL SHOVE THEM UP YOUR ASS!

Ki: Violent much?

Matt: YES! *walks away*

**Rule No.18: Don't have a bet that includes Matt aiming at something. You will ALWAYS lose…**

Matt: Like that one time I won a pool game with just one turn? What a fun day that was…

**Rule No.19: The Red Ring of Death is a gamer's worst nightmare.**

Toby: *wakes up and screams, waking up everybody*

Matt: Toby, what the hell is wrong with you?

Toby: I saw the Red Ring of Death in my dream…

Matt: … get a life Toby!

Everyone: *goes back to sleep*

**Rule No.20: Matt often insults Alvin…**

Matt: Wait… they're saying that David won?

Alvin: That's what they said.

Matt: Alvin, it's time we had a talk about They, they're a creepy, creepy group, and they're always talking, listen, you can hear them. They're saying, they're saying that I've lost it. They're saying they've seen enough. They're saying Matt sucks. They're saying it's David's time, THEY'RE SAYING THAT YOU HAVE NAKED PICTURES OF KI ON YOUR WEBSITE!

Alvin: *shakes his head*

Matt: I know. I know. And that last part is completely true… you sick, sick freak!

**(A;N) Once again, I was gonna wait until after The Boy, the Girl, and the Biker was done, but I was just too excited to wait. And if you want to see your OC in the story, please send the following information:**

**Name:**

**Nickname(s):**

**Appearance:**

**Personality: **

**Specialty:**

**And if you have any ideas for the rules, just leave them in a review or PM me. Thank you all, thanks for viewing, and please review. CamoHunter out…**


	2. A violent gettogether

**(A;N) Oh, it feels so good to be back! Sorry for the longer then usual wait. I work on a farm, and barely get time. So without further ado, I bring to you, the second chapter of Matt's Survival Guide…**

**Special thanks: I would like to thank EmilyAnaya19 for rule 40, MunkyRob for rule 39, YouTube Powers of Stupidity for rules 23-27, and KiBoy for rule 29.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Corey, Daniel, Jessica, Ikuto, Monica, Rob, and Chrystal. They belong to EmilyAnaya19, thatgirlyouwanttobe, YouTube Powers of Stupidity, and MunkyRob.**

**Chapter 2: A violent get together**

**Short side note: School is back in session for me (as a matter of fact, it has been for three weeks now. Good luck to everyone in school this year) so I'm a little rushed. So let's just say the following OC's have been there the whole time. ON WITH THE SHOW!**

**Rule No. 21: Ohh, say can you see, KABOOM!**

Matt: What in the blue hell…?

Alex: Ki, the author is talking gibberish again…

Ki: No he's not… *Corey, Daniel, Jessica, Ikuto, Monica, Rob, and Chrystal appear after an explosion*

Ki: You guys can't get any weirder, can you?

Matt: A lot…

**Rule No.22: Don't criticize Matt's country boy lifestyle…**

Ikuto: It's a really, really bad idea…

Alex: *raises an eyebrow* How in the hell do you know?

Ikuto: *lifts a pant leg up to reveal a shotgun wound*

Alex: You made fun of his 22, did you?

Ikuto: *nods his head*

**Rule No.23: Alvin, please don't try to get Ikuto and Monica into a fight… AGAIN! The last time they fought, half the house was ruined.**

Alvin: *bows his head* Sometimes, the whole house gets ruined…

Alex: But, thanks to Matt's incredible architect skills, the house gets rebuilt…

Matt: Last week I had to rebuild the house FOUR FREAKING TIMES!

**Rule No.24: Brittany, as much as you like fashion… don't criticize Monica's choice of clothing… then you'll be the one being chased by an angry chipette with a chainsaw…**

Danny: But I thought David and Ki confiscated the bazooka and the chainsaw…

Rob: They did… *sees what color the chainsaw is* Hey Matt, do you recognize that chainsaw?

Matt: Hey, wait a minute… THAT'S MY CHAINSAW!

**Rule No.25: Nobody touches the strawberries or the apples… nobody… especially you Alvin.**

Alvin: But I don't even like apples or strawberries…

Chrystal: Yeah, but you, Matt, Alex, Ki, and Lucas use them for footballs…

Alvin: *smirks* So true…

**Rule No.26: Ikuto, don't flirt with any of the chipettes… or then feel the wrath of their boyfriends… or themselves.**

Makayla: Last night, he learned that it's not a good idea to hit on Denise…

Lucas: What happened?

Kate: Remember those black and blue marks he came back with?

Ki: Yep.

Kate&Makayla: Yeah…

Everyone: *O-O*

Monica: *barely containing laughter*

**Rule No.27: Monica… as much as you like to sing in Japanese… if the song has a hidden dark meaning… DON'T EXPLAIN THE MEANING TO ANYONE WHO DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE LANGUAGE… Theodore got traumatized by your explanation to one of your songs…**

Matt: Hm? What was it?

Monica: *whispers the meaning*

Matt: Don't you think that's a LITTLE too descriptive?

Monica: *nods*

**Rule No.28 PIE!**

Alex: Well that's random…

Matt: I know, just… PIE!

CamoHunter: Haha, pie…

David: What… where the hell did you come from?!

CamoHunter: That doesn't matter now, just pie… haha, pie…

Matt: *eyes widen* Camo, get those 'thoughts' out of your head!

CamoHunter: Haha, nope…

**Rule No.29: Makayla, don't seduce guys who have girlfriends… while I think about it, Kate don't do it either.**

Kate&Makayla: Oh come on! Why not?

Luke: Makayla, you're a nympho, and Kate, you were impregnated at 15...

Makayla: Touche…

Kate: Point taken…

**Rule No.30: Julia is not allowed to shape shift… especially into Brittany…**

Matt: … I still haven't got over that yet…

Julia: *barely alive laughing* I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist!

**Rule No.31: It's all about the he said she said bull sh-**

Simon: David! Enough Limp Bizkit already!

Alex: Not here bro. Rated T…

David: Killjoy…

**Rule No.32: Keep rollin', rollin' rollin' rollin'-**

Everyone: NO!

David: KILLJOYS!

**Rule No.33: A country boy can sur-**

Ki: Oh, not you too Matt!

Matt: Hey, different song, different artist, different genre…

**Rule No.34: Pay Eleanor?**

Eleanor: Hm?

David: You still haven't paid us…

Eleanor: Okay, okay… *hands each of Ki, Lucas, and David ten dollars*

David: Thank you…

**Rule No.35: Always pay the fee for the Task Force Seville employment…**

Ki: If you don't, you'll wind up just like the victims…

Task Force Seville: *chuckles*

**Rule No.36: Matt is not allowed in the lab…**

Simon: Last time, he made the Ray Gun…

Jeanette: We didn't think it was possible…

Rob: So, this rule is out of jealousy?

Simon: Maybe just a little…

**Rule No.37: Wrestling anybody?**

Alvin: WWE!

Dave: WWF!

Toby: WCW!

David&Alex&Matt: ECW!

Alvin&Dave&Toby: ECW: Extremely Crappy Wrestling!

David&Alex&Matt: *fire eyes* You didn't! *attacks*

**Rule No.38: Don't make fun of ECW!**

David&Alex&Matt: *standing victorious over Alvin, Dave, and Toby* OORAH!

**Rule No.39: You don't want to sneak into Rob's laboratory and try out one of his devices, because those are more dangerous and creepy than the things in Area 51.**

Alex: Yeah, I've been down there, and it's true. And I've also been to Area 51, and believe me, that's saying something…

**Rule No.40: No playing Hide and Seek in the house!**

Matt: It almost ended as Alvin and the ChipmunK!

Corey: I feel so bad for Theodore!

Julia: Yeah, he only wanted a sip!

Matt: Never. Touch. My. Root. Beer!

_Flashback-two days ago_

_Alvin: I'm bored! _

_Lucas: We can have a sword fight tournament?!_

_Ki&Corey&David: YEAH!_

_Everyone else: NO!_

_Jeanette: Let's play a game!_

_Eleanor: Ooh ooh I know I know, hide and seek!_

_Everyone else: Okay!_

_Matt: I'm it! *hides eyes* 1, 2, 3, 4, 5..._

_Everyone: *runs and hides*_

_Corey&Julia&Theodore: *run into the root beer cellar*_

_Corey: They'll never find us down here!_

_10 minutes later_

_Corey&Julia&Theodore: *still not found* UGH!_

_Theodore: *whisper* Julia, Corey, I'm thirsty!_

_Julia: *eyes widen*_

_Corey: Theodore, don't even think about it!_

_Julia: Yeah, Matt will kill you if he finds out._

_Theodore: He won't notice if just one is gone!_

_Corey: Theo, don't do it!_

_Theodore: Ohhhh I can't help it! *grabs a bottle, opens it, and starts to drink*_

_Julia: Your funeral Theo._

_Matt: *from upstairs* Hey guys, I think I heard something! *walks downstairs and turns on the light* *sees Theodore drinking a bottle of root beer* Grrrrrrrrrrr *unsheathes claws*_

_Corey&Julia: Uh oh!_

_End of flashback_

Theodore: He dislocated my arm over a b-b-bottle of s-s-s-soda!

Matt: So then it's lesson learned?

**(A;N) So, how was it? Like it? Hate it? Well, I did my best, and that's all that matters, right? Anyway, I'm still open for OCs and rules, so PM me them or leave in a review. Now, thank you, thanks for viewing, and please review! CamoHunter out!**


End file.
